Sunday 25 November 2012

"I think we should stay friends"

Can you stay friends after a relationship ends?

This of course is a question many of us hope we will never have to face, however, when a relationship ends many of us take the stance that all forms of friendly communication should end there to. If this is true then why? 

Perhaps it's the whole all good things come to an end mentality for example: boyfri(end), girlfri(end), l(over).

OR  more likely it's that our exes just know too much, they know what makes us tick and what make us vulnerable and we shut these people out because, after all they've hurt you once with all this information, so what's to say it could never happen again? 

On the rare occasion that a break up is mutual  it may on the other hand possible to maintain such a friendly bong with said person. unfortunately for most of us break ups involve one person being the heart breaker and the other the hear broken. The heart breaker often resorting to final parting comments such as "it's not you! it's me!", which anyone who has ever had the delight of being on the receiving end of this charming little one liner will know, does not make you feel better about yourself, oh no, all it merely allow your ex to keep in contact with you painfully reminding you that yes, you were in fact dumped.  

Also your ex has seen you naked, butt naked, and for many of us pulling back from what is such an intimate relationship to one of just friends can be more damaging than actually beneficial. further more, if either one of you still has any feeling s left for the ex, then as a friend you will have to sit by and watch as they move on and live their lives with someone else. So here brings another problem that you are emotionally forbidden to confide in the ex thus meaning the chances of successful friendship are slim. 



Ultimately though, having an ex in your life just makes it harder to move on with your own life. Bitterness, jealousy, the irrational feeling that you don't want to see them with anyone else even when you have no feelings there. So unless it was a short affair that ended amicably or you were the best of friends before the relationship begun, the chances of maintaining a successful friendship may as well be 100 to 1.

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